Types of Narcissists
Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is a cluster B personality disorder with a long-term pattern of abnormal behaviour characterized by exaggerated feelings of self-importance, an excessive need for admiration, and a lack of empathy which can lead to exploitation of others. We all have narcissistic traits but they become a problem when a person has many of these traits and this impacts on the way they interact with others. A person with NPD more than likely struggles with their own identity and self worth so this in turn leads to them behaving in cruel ways to the people they are involved with. The impact of being in a relationship with someone who is showing a lot of signs of NPD can take its toll on your physical and mental health due to the constant states of anxiety and the body releasing cortisol and adrenaline.
Covert Narcissist:
The covert narcissist is usually charming to others outside the family home so you are left questioning whether you are oversensitive or really seeing this behaviour.
They are overly critical - Because they have so many insecurities of their own, they have a tendency to be overly critical of those around them. Projecting their own weaknesses onto those in their path, they can leave you to feel stupid, unwanted, or insignificant.
Although charming you only see it when they want something - Very charismatic when they want to be, the covert narcissist's charm only comes out when they want something from you or the people around you. Like a switch, they can turn it on and turn it off.
No matter what happens you always feel at fault - As upset as you are with them, if you confront them or get into an argument with them, they manipulate the situation with such mastery that you end up feeling at fault and apologizing. A covert narcissist knows exactly how to spin something to make you feel like everything you were thinking is wrong, even when your own common sense and logic tells you otherwise. This tactic can be so mind-manipulating that you can start to feel like you're going insane.
They leave you feeling empty in a relationship with them - Regardless of the time you are together, the experiences that you share with them and the closeness that you crave, it always feels as if something is missing or isn't quite right.
They don't care if they have to lie, steal or cheat to get what they want - A narcissist sees everyone in relation to what they can do for them. Not really caring about anyone but themselves, everyone and everything is merely a tool to get what they want in life.
There is something empty and uncaring about them that you can't put your finger on - There's no way to get close to them in a relationship. As if there is a protective layer to them that you can't penetrate, things never seem quite right or real when you're with a covert narcissist.
They will play the victim - A covert narcissist will make you feel sorry for them, no matter what the truth of the matter is. Everything is someone else's fault, and they are always merely an innocent bystander.
They over react to any criticism - If you criticize them, they will overreact, and their anger is quick. Always needing praise and admiration, if you challenge them, they will attack to regain their dominance.
They are passive aggressive - If you feel like you're going insane, you are probably with a covert narcissist. They will plant seeds and let them grow. Making tiny suggestions about who you are or what you have done, they leave it to rest and fester in you until you believe it to be true.